"Strange things are happening to me, ain't no doubt about it."

(Written August 17, 2010)

Nabbed a little inspiration from a conversation today, added and subtracted - mixed up some words and made it into a dialogue. Enjoy, I suppose:



Patient: I feel like I have to make a clarification with you, since you're my therapist n' all... I haven't just been ignoring you, I've been kind of ignoring everybody. I keep having these sickly intense dreams lately where I...



Therapist: no worries, no sweat, no need to explain.



Patient: But sir, they are those of the terrifying nature of where i almost die, or have killed others!



Therapist: Scary stuff. (Feels unsure to admit it but decides to be the 'real' therapist who admits defeat instead of making the generalization that 'it happens to everybody!') Guess I've had those too...



Patient: (unphased by the therapists admission of insanity) Each one has the ability to put me in an everlasting funk for 24 hours, and after the amount I've had - let's just say it's like roll over minutes for your phone. They're so overlapped - here, I will elaborate to you how bogged down my head is by spelling the word - Effffff.. (holds it out 10 seconds.) youuuu.. (10 sec.) Ehnnn.. (10 sec.) KAY! (1 sec + exclamation.)



Therapist: Well.... (strokes the scruff on his chin) I usually wake up right before I kill 'em, and I'm scared out of my fucking mind. (pause, blank 'deer-caught-in-the-headlights' look at the file cabinet in the back of the room behind the patient.) They stay with me too.

(Eyes jolt right back to patient, mouth attempts to open at the same time to save himself from trailing off into his own head.)

But as far as you and I are concerned? I'm not worried, and you shouldn't be either. Please do describe, if you can, any of the dreams in detail?



Patient: I had one last night, people were vanishing and they suspected I was the culprit, but I quite literally don't remember doing anything to anyone.



Therapist: Hmmm... (stroka-da-chinny chin chin.) You did tell me last week that you feel like the world is conspiring against you...





Patient: The night before last had me tied up to the outside of an airplane, with all my relatives safely inside - and going through turbulence - I saw it all through first person - how low it was to the ground and trees! I had to hang on for dear life in a severe panic stricken strife.

(pause.)

But I didn't die, I made it.





Therapist: But you were shitting your pants, metaphorically speaking.



Patient: Yes.



Therapist: Well I'm definitely sorry you are experiencing this funk.



Patient: You know what? It's okay.. I think i'm going to try to write about it, even though try has the equivalent to struggle.



Therapist: (does a 'by joe!' physical arm swing while saying) 'Atta girl! When's the last time you did that?



Patient: (laughs in a fake haughtily tone to hide her bad resentment towards her inability when she says) Not in a long time.



Therapist: And therein, lies the nature of the struggle.