OH MY GOD I'M STILL ALIVE.

breathing. miraculous is the only word i can fathom for the calm, chill sense of relief that has washed over me. the underdog made it. it was so tough to keep my cool... it was absolutely brutal (most of the brutality congregating/coalescing in my noggin: outwardly affable and quiet, but deeply wounded inside.) it was so wonderful to me to know how much everyone in this restaurant respects me, to think I was to blame, to then immediately realize the problem was not I, but someone else... and then we had to all be tactical to rid of the problem, which we are at the same time sad to say was a problem. but bittersweet is all I can feel after having my hours severely shafted for a month because of this individuals unfortunate personal dilemmas. sooo done with mindfuckery ferra good while, at least, pretty please, some sort of spirit? not into it anymore whatsoever. blergh.

now I'm like this turtle, gingerly taking in gulps of air.