My internal clock is taking a beatdown with these crazy hours.
Basically: 4:45pm, grab bus. Walk 15 minutes to work, which is 6pm to midnight. Walk back to bus stop, get home around 1-ish (luckily tonight a super awesome co-worker gave me a ride home.) and generally around the stroke of 10 or so, my brain is literally seething with pain, and I keep on keepin' on with the surveys. Called New Jersey & Cali tonight - the Cali study was actually political & mentioned the protests in the middle east at the moment; got to survey some opinionated young women which was ... uplifting.
Unlike getting home and passing out right away like last night however, I seem to be strangely awake. It's almost 3am and here I am. It's as if I'm writing this right now to comfort my loneliness... sleep, eat, go to work, repeat. I don't 'hang' with anyone anymore, I don't even want to anyways... every time I try something frustrates me into not wanting to deal with it. Everything is too serious with me.
What makes me smile though? The little girl who wanted to show me her parfait cup in line at Trader Joes today. She was so happy that I was so happy that she was going to eat something delicious. And the fact that I noticed her seemed to have the cashier notice her and give her stickers. At this point she was pretty ecstatic.
This is stupidly random, but I wanted to think of a list of my staple foods/drinks - so shopping can be easier, and since it's so easy to start here, ALAS - LIST TIME!
Coffee, Diet Coke, lemonade, orange juice, whiskey, IPA, spinach, red leaf lettuce, tomatoes, mushrooms, brussel sprouts, avocados, any color peppers, celery, broccoli, sharp cheddar, cream cheese, cottage cheese, everything bagels, balsamic vinagrette, edamame, popcorn, trail mix..... realizing that I really don't eat much fruit?
Crap I just got one of my weird heart palpitations again... it's been happening randomly lately and it kind of seizes up my body. Ohhhh wellll...
Sunday will get here soon enough?
(PS: Thinking about Texas...)
1 comment:
Karyn, you still in Northampton? Last time I read your blog, it gave me a feeling that you were moving out.
Coming back to this post, you seem to have lost hope in love and in my opinion 'Keep the hope candle burning, it might lit up your entire life someday'.
Hope you are having a good spring break.
S.
Post a Comment